Tag Archives: People

The Weak Chin Explained

A couple of weeks ago, I was away at a cottage with some friends.  I accidentally let it slip that one of my physical turn-offs were men with weak chins.  Since then, I’ve been bothered by the fact that I may not have been totally clear regarding the so called “weak chin”.  I mean, saying that I have a general dislike for men with weak chins makes me sound shallow!  While I maintain that I am not, the weak chin is simply something I have difficulty getting past.  This weekend away had me questioning whether weak chins really bothered me.  Could I get past a weak chin if  a guy had everything else going on?  Is a weak chin a deal breaker?  In my search to find the answers to these questions, I came upon a few realizations.

What is a weak chin?

A weak chin (as so wonderfully demonstrated by Teresa during the cottage weekend), is a recessed chin that appears disproportionately smaller than a person’s nose.

Exhibit A

If you were to take a ruler and hold it vertically from the tip of this guy’s nose, there would be at least a half inch gap between his chin and the ruler.

Exhibit B

This poor guy’s chin is almost a part of his neck!

So…can a person do something to fix a weak chin? Well sure, there is such a thing as chin augmentation surgery but can a weak chin be hidden by a beard?

You tell me.

Can a person get past their weak chin and be seen as attractive by people?

Unsure? Want a closer look?

So what’s the solution? While there is no solution for my picky tastes, there is a simple solution out there for those with weak chins provided to you here, free of charge.

Kelry

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Prissy Prius Drivers

In life we have many expectations.  Many of them are expectations that are shared by those around us.  Every once in awhile though, we may be surprised by expectations we didn’t realize we even had.

I had one of those surprises not too long ago.  I was leaving the garage of my building, ready to drive out and run some errands.  I exited in my usual way, going straight towards the ramp.  While other traffic often drives toward the ramp from the right, the usual dance of hesitant approach to the intersection followed by a mutual agreement of who is going to go first, usually ensues. 

You can all guess what happened next.  I approached the intersection with usual caution, only to be left in the proverbial dust by…(are you ready for this?)…a Prius!

Not only was I annoyed by this rude act but even more so because it was a Prius.  I realized I had higher expectations of behaviour from someone who drove such an environmentally friendly car.  I guess I figured if people were kinder to the environment by purchasing that car, then they were generally kinder people.

Is this unreasonable?  I don’t think so.  I think that if you choose to purchase a Prius, there should be some sort of kindness questionnaire or test that you have to pass in order to drive that car.  A kind of test that would weed out the kinds of people who purchase a Prius just to make it seem like they are these high and mighty environmentally friendly people when really they are jerks like the rest of us and reserve that kind of a car for people who really are kinder and care more for everyone and everything around them.  Simply put, people who drive a Prius should be nice.

Kelry

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The Failure of “Boobquake”

So…apparently about a week and a half ago, an Iranian senior cleric by the name of  Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi stated that women are to blame for the recent earthquakes.  It is the mere act of wearing revealing clothes that sends tremors through the earth.  Ok, so it’s not quite this simple, it is the act that then leads men astray and therefore causes corruption which in turn causes earthquakes.

In one article I read about it, the author even went so far as to use the term “boobageddon”!  Now that’s one for the new vocabulary list.

Well, little did we all know, this suggestion would be put to the test.  Led by a university student, she encouraged all women to dress in a revealing way today, to see if it would in face cause a “boobquake” or even worse – “BOOBAGEDDON”!!!

Sadly, or not so sadly, it didn’t do anything.  Of course, it is not so sad because we would not want to cause anymore unnecessary destruction to the earth but wouldn’t it be great if women’s breasts had that much power??  With a quick flash or jiggle, we could cause a crack to open up in the sidewalk, a tree to blow over or even a sudden gust of wind!  Then perhaps, depending on the variety that is out there, people could have powers to do various things!  Ah, but I digress, we, as women, of course, do not have that power but I must ask…if you did have the power of “boobageddon”, what would your power be?  Feel free to respond!

Kelry

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Old People in Big Cars

What is it with the elderly driving large cars?  I mean, I have nothing against the elderly, nor do I have anything against big cars but putting the two together creates an automatic war zone in any metropolitan area. 

I literally feel like I’m suddenly a stealth fighter, trying to anticipate my enemy’s moves.  I mean, I was driving downtown tonight and literally, I feel this presence beside me.  A haunting, wavering, hovering presence.  A quick glance to my left revealed the enemy.  A man that had to be in his 80’s, hunched over the steering wheel, squinting his enemy stare through large, thick glasses. 

With my heightened awareness, I immediately sized up the situation.  Ok, a three lane road, not much other traffic on the road, some slushy conditions, nighttime.  If I had to speed up or brake to avoid this hazard, I could and more importantly, if I had to change lanes to get around and ahead of him I could do that as well…

The enemy crept closer beside me, taunting me by crossing over the broken lines on the road.  I slowed down a bit, allowing him to play out his attack.  He pressed on the brakes seeing that the road went downhill.  This obviously threw him off course and gave me a chance to play into his faults.  I eased by him with my guard up, only looking back to ensure he wasn’t about to pull a trick move.

Phew!  That was a close one and there are many other enemies like that out on the road.  You just have to keep your guard up and have a game plan is all.

kelry

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Small Town Speak

Seven years ago, my parents moved to a small town up North.  I love it up there.  I’ve always said that and I mean it.  I love the fresh air, the friendliness of the community, the absence of big box stores (for the most part).  I savour the fresh air and being by the water.  I like that every time I come up, my parents see fit to inform me on all of the new things that have happened in town (i.e., new restaurants, a changed store sign and sometimes some small town political rift).

I am up visiting right now and my Mom and I had to go to a store today to return an item.  As usual we walked in and my Mom immediately struck up a conversation with the clerk:

“You probably don’t remember me.”

“Of course I do!”

This sure doesn’t happen down in the big city.  It was something else though…something that, if I ever lived here, could still not pull off and something that indeed only occurs in small towns.  We completed the return and as we left the store, the clerk called after us:

“See ya’s later!”

Ummm…now, I know I’m a bit of a stickler for grammar but the amazing thing about this was that this person made the phrase sound perfectly normal to my ears.  Even with a lot of practice, I know I would still be unable to pull that off and make it roll off the tongue like this person did.  My next thought was:  How does one respond to such a phrase? I suppose these would be some appropriate responses:

“No, I’ll see YOU’S later”

“You mean, see ya’s later alligators”  This one would then be followed by the person in turn responding “After awhiles crocodiles”

“Ok, I’se will”

kelry

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Atlayanta

I had the pleasure of spending the weekend in Atlanta at a conference. While the weekend was filled with work, I did do my best to keep my eyes open to the interesting sights around me.

My flight had one stop in Philidelphia before continuing onto Atlanta and while it was still too early in the morning to be fully aware, as I settled into the lounge in Philly, something caught my eye. A man walked into the lounge and settled into on of the chairs across from me. There was nothing out of the ordinary about the man himself except for the sheer irony he brought with him on his t-shirt.  He was a man in what I guessed to be his early 20’s but looked older due to his protruding stomach. He wore the t-shirt below:

Body_by_nes-T

I realize that the t-shirt in and of itself is supposed to be ironic but the fact that this guy seemed to fit the ironic profile to a tee made me smile.

Atlanta itself was a pleasant surprise. I think I was expecting a bigger, busier city where I would feel as much of a cultural outsider as if I were overseas. What I saw was an open city that was divided into three sections. The fact that the city was spread out probably helped give it the open, smaller feel. The people there were beyond friendly. I could not get over just how nice people were. I’m not sure if the welcoming feel came from simple friendliness or the fact that when the security guy at the Atlanta airport greeted me with “Hey baby”, not only did it not offend me but made me feel great!

It seemed that the people who populated this city were once people who lived in small towns.  These people had clearly brought that small town charm with them.

I can honestly say that I hope I get to go back to Atlanta one day and actually see some sights rather than the inside of a convention centre.  If not for the “real” CNN headquarters or the Coca-Cola factory, at least to see the world’s largest aquarium.

kelry

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Roller Derby 101

I went to a roller derby match last night. Admittedly, I knew that going would inevitably create material for a new blog post but a friend of mine announced recently that she was in a 10-week training session to become a roller derby girl (if that’s what you call them). I was curious to find out if today’s roller derby was just like the 1970’s picture I had in my head of people in wild outfits, punching, pushing and shoving other people off the track.

This match took place in an old hangar. It was the Death Track Dolls vs. the Gore Gore Girls. I’m not sure what I expected but it was indeed an old hangar. I kept wondering who on earth goes to these matches. Well, obviously tonight, it was me but the fact that we had to wait in line to get in showed me that there is obviously some kind of fan base.

We stepped inside and took in the scene. The flat track was only marked by some taped down tubing and there was a small table set up in the middle. Not only were there stands set up all around the hangar but people had even brought their own lawn chairs and had set up on the floor. The really brave ones sat directly on the floor only a few feet from the track. My friend pointed out that area as the “suicide zone” because apparently some of the players actually fall into the crowd.

We found some seats within the safety of the stands, asking the kind gentleman with his nose, tongue, lip, both eyebrows and ears pierced if the seats were free. I sat down and tried to understand who these people were that came to these matches. While it was a bit of a mixed crowd, most people, decorated with numerous piercings and tattoos, were clearly friends of the players.

My observations were quickly interrupted with the announcer, nicknamed “Crankypants” announcing each referee. It was difficult to understand him through the distorted speaker system so I referred to my program. It became clear very quickly that everyone had a nickname – even the refs. The first ref out was “Sir Refsalot”, adorned in a kilt. The biggest cheers came for “The Krow” though, who came out wearing black wings and skated with wings spread around the track.

The announcer then began announcing the names…things like “Lunchbox” and “Dust Bunny” and “Dolly Parts ‘Em”. As the names were announced, these women came out and paraded around the track.

The Death Track Dolls were the first to be introduced, in their white tank tops. Each woman wore some kind of tights/stockings and many wore torn up fishnet stockings underneath bootie shorts or a short skirt. The women on this team even took time to do their makeup, adding things like fake blood coming out of their mouths and white and black make up to make them look dead. The theme of the Gore Gore Girls was clearly leopard skin, as they all came out wearing some sort of leopard skin leotard again matched with various stockings. We were then asked to stand for the national anthem. We all stood their in silence until a recording of O Canada came on about halfway through the first verse. A singer quickly joined in and while his voice was lovely, he made the grave mistake of stopping and listening to the recording his voice had previously drowned out. He, and the entire hangar of fans quickly realized he was not at all with the recording. He panicked, and tried to come in at the right time but came in with the wrong words! He stopped again and then got back on track just in time for the final line of the song.

The match got started soon after that and while it took me some time to understand what was going on, I again, referred to my booklet to help me. After reading the explanation of the game and the rules, I realized this roller derby was a little different than older versions. Apparently there was no punching or even elbowing allowed. ‘Phew!’

As the game continued, the announcer continued talking through the mic, informing people of what was going on. When he wasn’t doing that, he was trying to get the crowd excited and cheering loudly. His method however, in my opinion, left a lot to be desired. Sure he said all of the right things but as he demanded the audience cheer “louder! Louder! LOUDER!!”, his face only looked angrier. I mean, it was going purple with rage. I think in the end, the fans were intimidated into cheering louder.

After the first thirty minute period, it was announced that there would be a thirty minute break. I wondered if there was going to be some sort of 7th inning stretch. It was somewhere between watching one fan build a pyramid of beer cans on the floor and noticing the woman wearing a spiked, purple bra that covered only her one remaining breast that the dancers came out.

Two young girls came out dressed like some sort of angels. Perhaps it is because I’ve been spoiled by watching “So You Think You Can Dance” and seeing some really fabulous dancers but these ones just seemed to wave their arms and run back and forth. Perhaps it wasn’t even the dancing itself that I was disappointed with but the fact that it just seemed so out of place at this particular venue.

The second half started with much of the same action that the first half of the game held. It was fast paced and it seemed that when there was a fall, the key was to act as dramatically as possible, curling up in pain, or slapping the floor. After each dramatic episode however, the women got up and continued skating without any problems.

The game ended and the Gore Gore Girls got to do their victory lap around the track. While it was an interesting night, we didn’t stick around long after the game!

Kelry

roller derby

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